I had plenty of ideas of how I was going to let you all know “the scoop”. But when it came down to it…I’m at a loss. So I’m just going to put it out there.
Eric and I are expecting a new addition to our family in October; October 21st to be exact!
There I said it! PHEW!
I’ve been holding out on spilling the amazing news for so long because it was so early when we found out, as we knew it would be. And it still is so early. 6 weeks= SUPER EARLY!
So we actually found out for sure on Tuesday February 12th (14dpiui #1) when I had my first positive beta, 198. Two days later (16dpiui #1) it jumped to 490. One week later (21 dpiui #1) up to 3291. Now as of yesterday we are over 5000 and they don’t dilute over 5000, so we don’t know the exact number.
Of course I didn’t wait until the actual first beta. No. I started testing at home at 10dpiui. I got a very faint line that first day. I wanted to know whether it was still the trigger shot or an actual positive, so I tested again the next day and got a slightly darker line. The following day I tested again, and en even darker line popped up. Yup, I was pretty confidant it was real, but Eric kept me grounded and wanted to wait for any excitement until we had the two initial betas to make sure there were numbers and that they were going in the right direction. Man, were we shocked. I still am in shock!
We have only told our parents, and a few very close friends. We want to wait to tell the rest of our family and friends until we hit the 8 week mark.
My first sonogram was last Tuesday, with a different doctor. Long story short, my doctor had an emergency and couldn’t make it to our local office so we had to go to the main office and have our sono by a different MD that we’ve never seen. He showed us two gestational sacs. We flipped! One was exactly half the size of the other so he said it was possible that it would disappear. On yesterday’s sonogram we only saw 1 sac. I will also say that the sono machine from yesterday was not nearly as high tech as the one at the main office; I mean the clarity was like night and day. So my doctor said we will see what next week’s sono shows. I will take this opportunity to add that both Eric and I are just as happy with one as we are with two. So we will see what happens. My gut feeling is that there is just one little one in there.
Yesterday was definitely a milestone. We got to see how much the sac has grown and got to see the tiny little flicker of our precious little ones heartbeat! It was the sweetest thing I’ve ever seen! We both stared at the screen in amazement. It was an incredible moment for us as parents to be.
So that’s the update. And that’s why I’m super fanatical about the whole fever thing…See “SICKO” post from earlier today. I can only take Robitussin DM for my chest congestion and Tylenol ONLY if my fever goes over 101. I hate to take anything, especially in the first trimester. But I’m dealing. Lots of rest and fluids is keeping me going. No appetite, but I know I have to eat a little something.
I’ll post the sono pics as soon as I scan them in!
Thank you all for being so patient with me over the past couple of weeks!! It was well worth the wait, right?
UGH! I’m sick. So sick I can’t remember the last time I felt so miserable, physically. I am the lucky host to a Bladder Infection along with the Flu. WTF?? How did this happen? My husband was very sick Saturday through Tuesday, but I’ve been a Lysol queen the past 4 days. I mean…to the point of choking on it. But somehow it still got me. And I must say that Eric has been so incredibly sweet to me, not that that surprises me, because he’s always amazing. But he’s been super incredibly sweet the past couple days. He even left the house early today before catching his train, to go get me a new thermometer, b/c ours is not working anymore. He didn’t come home with one, but two. He said it was so I can check my temperature with both and compare. If you haven’t noticed over the past 4 months, I’m fanatical. So yeah…he’s pretty cool and I think I’ll keep him!My temperature has been between 99.0 and 99.8 over the past day. My body is ridiculously achy, especially my upper back. This pretty much just sucks!
So here I sit on the couch with my pillow, blankie, tissues, thermometer, apple juice cut with H2O (yes I’m a child when I’m sick), phone, Lysol and my laptop. Not to mention I keep having to reconnect because I keep losing service!! Rrgghhh! Anyway…
I will be in and out of consciousness today. I was supposed to go to lunch with Kim over at JoggingInCircles and our awesome friend Fran, to Cheesecake Factory no less- mmmmmmm- but I had to bail. And it kills me to just sit/ lay here. But I guess I should look at it as forced relaxation. After all, I haven’t been sleeping so very well the past couple weeks.
I’ve been saying all winter now, “I wish we would get just one nice snowfall.”…
Well, this morning we here on Long Island woke up to the most beautiful snowfall I can remember in a while. Each tiny little branch on every single tree has a gorgeous blanket of snow covering it. I LOVE THAT! I laid in bed and just watched the snow fall for almost an hour thins morning. I don’t think there’s anything more peaceful than that.
Yeah the streets are an absolute mess. As is my driveway (its gravel and therefore really difficult to shovel without ridding the driveway of all its gravel, UGH). I would say there is about 4 inches out there, which may not seem like a lot compared to other parts of the country, but this is the most we’ve had in quite some time!
Oh have I been a deadbeat and a half this past week or so! Damn! I know this b/c people keep reminding me just how much of a deadbeat I have been. Don’t worry, I hope to resume normal posting by the end of the weekend! Woot!
In the meantime, why don’t you mosey on over to eBay and check out my new listings. You never know, you may find some stuff you need/ want. I have some brand new things, some still in their original packaging. Please don’t get all concerned that I have a ‘0′ feedback rating; everyone has to start somewhere and I’m not in the position to go buy things I don’t need or want just to build up a rating. I’m super honest and reliable; ask anyone who knows me.
**Anyone enjoy Lenox pieces like vases and candle holders? Get your ass over there!
**Want some brand new glass photo coasters? What are you waiting for?
**Any Yankee Candle lovers out there? I just listed a 22oz Housewarmer jar yesterday.
And there is plenty more. I am also cleaning out my Coach Bag collection, so check back often! I told you I’ve been cleaning, purging and organizing lately! I’ve been rather busy. And I still have tons too tackle.
You will notice an ad over in the left sidebar for my eBay listings. From there you can check out all of my auctions.
I figured I would partake in Scrolling Saturday today, if that’s alright will all you lovelies! Thanks to Melissa at SuchSimplePleasures and Coleen at MannersandMoxie for this wonderful idea!I will be posting my very first post, from back in November 2007 when I had just 1 reader, Kim over at JoggingInCircles.
Here it is:
So here I am, 26 years old and having trouble getting pregnant? Is that even possible? I could see if I were maybe 10 years older, but I’m not, so the problem lies where? Why the infertility? I’m pretty fit and at a healthy weight, don’t do drugs, only drink alcohol occasionally, and quit smoking 2 ½ years ago. I’d say that’s the ideal portrait of a healthy woman…no?
There comes a point in time where most people know you’re trying to conceive. So they don’t leave you alone about it. Please don’t get me wrong, I’ve found much comfort in reading other women’s war stories online and conversing with friends and strangers about them as well. So I figured, why not start a blog about my stories? Who knows, maybe somebody will find as much comfort in reading about my stories, as I have about others.
Warning: This may just be the longest blog post you have ever encountered. I have 11 months to backfill just to bring you up to speed on my current situation.
It all started December 15th 2006, when I made the decision to stop taking birth control, which I had been taking since May of 2003. My thinking here was to have my cycle regulated by the time my husband and I were ready to start trying to conceive our first child. After all, I’ve read this could take up to a year.
After throwing out the last pack of pills, and withdrawing right away, I figured “this would be cake; I’d be regulated and fertile as anything in no time”! Apparently life had a different idea for me, because after having my period the end of December and again in January, it didn’t show in February and was nowhere in sight.
March 2007
A tad concerned over going an entire month and a half without getting my period, I called my OB/Gyn to make him aware of what was going on and he said “If you don’t get your period by April 15, call me and I’ll prescribe Provera to make you withdraw”. Needless to say, I went on to withdraw on my own in early April and scheduled an appointment to see the doctor, at his request, to discuss what was going on with me. Of course the earliest appointment they had available was weeks away in May, so I took it.
May 2007
Upon this visit he opted to send me for some blood work to determine what exactly was going on with my system. My FSH, LH, Estrogen, Progesterone, and Thyroid levels were all tested as was my husband to make sure there was nothing wrong on his end. He also had me schedule an appointment for a sonogram to make sure that there was nothing structurally abnormal with my uterus and ovaries. I went for all my testing and scheduled a follow up visit to go over all the results.
June 2007
I had my follow up visit to go over the results of the testing from last month. I was told that everything was fine with my husband’s analysis but my progesterone levels were low which told him I wasn’t ovulating so I was a great candidate for the fertility drug Clomid. He sent me for a quantitative HCG to make sure I was not pregnant and then put me on Provera to bring on my period.
Now, I’ve read about Clomid and was honestly a bit nervous that he had decided to jump to put me on a fertility medication so quickly. But, him being the doctor and me being the obsessive patient who wants to get pregnant, I decided to go with it and rushed home to read everything I may have previously missed about this miracle drug. An important piece of information I gathered, not only from my own research but from friends who have also been on this therapy, was that you should be closely monitored via ultrasound and/ or blood work. This is the most surefire way to determine if it is working for you.
I won’t forget to mention that at a friend’s birthday party in June, two close friends announced their pregnancy. My husband and I were thrilled for both of them! But it also confirmed how NOT pregnant I was. “Commence to Start” the Clomid!
For anyone who doesn’t know about Clomid, it is a fertility drug that you should only take for 3- 6 months, max. Chances are if it doesn’t work within the 3- 6 months, it will not work at all. Without getting into the technical side of the drug, long story short, it is supposed to make you ovulate, a department I was clearly lacking.
July 2007
So I fill the prescription for Provera and finally got my period 7/16/07, which meant I could start my first round of Clomid on cycle day 5. I took the prescribed 100 mg a day for 5 days and waited. And I waited.
August 2007
When I went back to the doctor for a follow/ annual visit. I told him I had taken the Clomid as prescribed but was unsure if I had ovulated, b/c I never got a positive result when testing for my LH surge using the ANSWER Daily Ovulation Tracker and still hadn’t gotten my period. He sent me for a quantitative HCG which came back with my levels at 0, not pregnant.
Now I had been feeling a bit uncomfortable with my doctor for a couple for months. Was it the way he blew off my first concern over not getting my period for so long? Was it that he was so quick to prescribe Clomid for me with the only explanation being that I was not ovulating? Was it that when I questioned why he had not done a mid cycle ultrasound to see if I had a chance of ovulating from the Clomid, he told me it was a low dose and only my first cycle so it wasn’t necessary? Whatever it was, I decided it was time to look for a new doctor.
After speaking with a bunch of my girlfriends at a party one Saturday, I decided to try one of their doctors whose office happens to be conveniently right around the corner from my home. I called the office and they were able to get me in for an appointment right away. I went, looking forward to getting some straight answers, and hit it off with the staff and doctor immediately. I proceeded to transfer all my records over and became an established patient as quickly as I could. I was eager to get this all straightened out!
During this consult the doctor took a good 40 minutes with me! Practically unheard of in my past experiences! My other doctor was always in and out in a matter of seconds…literally! Total pun intended. Not this doctor, he had me sit in his office and listened attentively as I explained what I had been through over the past 8 months. He told me his plan would be to hold off sending me for any testing until after I got my period again, since fertility testing is cycle day sensitive (a little piece of information my old doctor obviously let slip his mind). While I was a bit bummed that he wasn’t going to give me any meds so we could get this process started right away, I was putting my faith in his hands, as I had heard only wonderful stories about him. My husband’s reassurance of what a better position we were in now helped too. I had a transvaginal sonogram right away to check out my uterus and ovaries to look for cysts or anything else that shouldn’t be there, and this showed multiple baby cysts on both ovaries. The new plan of action would be as follows:
1- Complete blood workup to rule out polycystic ovary syndrome on cycle day 3
2- Hysterosalpingogram any day between cycle days 7-10
3- Be patient, you will get pregnant
Reassuring.
So I ended up leaving there feeling pretty good, that I was in trustworthy hands and was on the right track to get my system straightened out in order to have our first baby!
September 2007
To my surprise, I did get my period on 9/5/07 and went on to have my PCOS workup on 9/7/07 and the HSG done on 9/14/07 and then scheduled a follow up for 9/27/07 to go over all these results.
9/27/07 could not come fast enough! The ay finally arrived and at this follow up visit, the doctor explained to my husband and me that my blood work came back great! He was pleased to see my insulin levels, and thyroid and liver functions were great and he was impressed by how perfect my cholesterol levels were! Woo hoo!! My HSG showed no uterine or fallopian tube abnormalities or blockages. I’m feeling really good. He then went on to say that the cysts on my ovaries shown on the transvaginal sonogram were consistent with PCOS. He explained that what is happening is the follicles on my ovaries are not getting to maturation size and therefore just turning into cysts, whereas normally, one follicle (or in some cases more than one) would become dominant and release the egg to then be fertilized. Voila…BABY! Of course it’s a bit more complicated than that, but you get the idea.
After talking for a while he decided to send me for blood to test my progesterone level to see if I had ovulated this cycle. Pending these results, he said he may give me Provera to bring on my period if I do not get it on my own by mid October and then possibly start me on my first “real” cycle of Clomid. Testing progesterone levels for ovulation is sensitive to cycle day 21, which it just so happened to be! My husband and I also happened to be on our way to the hospital anyway to visit friends who had just given birth the night before, so I would just stop down at the lab quick and have blood drawn.
The next day I received a call from the doctor letting me know the results of my progesterone levels. They were 1.2 on cycle day 21; they should have been more like 8-10 or possibly even higher. This told the doctor that I indeed did not ovulate this cycle and he right away called in a prescription for Clomid, 50 mg to be taken on cycle days 5-9 of my next cycle and again said that if I do not start my next cycle by mid October, to notify him and he would call in Provera to bring on my period so I can start with my treatment.
Now, I know they say not to start a vigorous exercise routine while you are trying to conceive, but I had been meaning to get back into the gym and just could not motivate myself. I was also feeling ridiculously stressed and decided the gym would probably do me much more good than harm at this point. My husband, being as wonderful as he is, offered to purchase personal training sessions for me, as well as a 4 week workshop on nutrition. I can say now that that just may have been the best thing that has ever happened to me…besides him of course…he’ll enjoy that little plug! The goal here was have an outlet to de-stress and get myself toned up and in better shape for a pregnancy. I would also like to continue exercising throughout my pregnancy, so I figured this would be perfect!
October 2007
By October 15, I still had not started my next cycle and had a negative pregnancy test, so I followed doctor’s orders and started on Provera that day, and finally withdrew on 10/30/07 while on a much needed vacation in Ft Lauderdale.
**So now this brings us to the present and we are talking about my current cycle; slightly more interesting.
November 2007
Now that I started my cycle on 10/30/07 I can begin taking Clomid on 11/3/07, which should make me ovulate anywhere between 11/10/07 and 11/16/07. At the instruction of the doctor, I began testing for my LH surge using the Clearblue Easy-Digital Ovulation Test on cycle day 11, 11/9/07. I could swear I detected my surge between 11/10/07 and 11/11/07 so I immediately called the doctor Monday morning, 11/12/07, to let them know. They had me come down for a sonogram on Wed 11/14/07 and the results showed that I had multiple follicles in both ovaries, but one clearly dominant on the right side. The doctor was positive that my first round of Clomid was a success in making me ovulate and said that if I did not get my period by 11-28, he would send me for a quantitative HCG. I of course told him that I was not getting my hopes up that the first round of Clomid would result in pregnancy, as I had so many times before only to be let down.
Needless to say, ever since that appointment on 11/14/07, every little cramp or twinge, headache or sign of fatigue, bout of nausea whether it be due to taking my prenatals on an empty stomach or not, I swear I’m pregnant. See here I go obsessing again.
So now we sit and wait while trying not to get our hopes up too high. And so the saga continues…
Today it is beautiful outside; sunny- definitely windy; but it is supposed to be in the 40’s which is nice compared to below zero earlier this week. Last year on Valentine’s Day we had a blizzard like none other here on Long Island. It was super messy. My boss at the time was stuck in an airplane with his 3 children (all under 6) for 6 hours because of the conditions. And knowing how bad it was outside, made us sit at work the entire day. Needless to say the drive home was treacherous. He didn’t give a shit though…he was going to Florida. Ass!
Anyway…today is much nicer than it was last year! Eric and I have no real plans for this evening. He usually doesn’t get off the train until around 7 or so, and we go out to eat all the time, so we don’t feel the need to go out on Valentine’s Day and spend double what we normally would just because it’s Valentine’s Day. We usually look for a good recipe (as opposed to a bad one?) and cook together over the weekend. We set the dining room table real nice and use our fine china and gorgeous drinking glasses and eat like big people. It’ nice. We barely use the dining room table, except for when we have company. Normally we eat breakfast and dinner at the kitchen table. So it’s great when we actually sit in there. So that’s what we will do this weekend. I always look forward to it!
We may stop by our parent’s house to say hello later tonight, but thats still up in the air right now.
I hope you all have a wonderful day! Many hugs and hearts go out to all of you!
I’ve been a bit of a slacker with my blog lately and I apologize to all my wonderful friends, both new and old, who visit regularly to read about me. I guess I’ve been in a bit of a funk with not many new details to provide about the whole fertility thang and nothing too exciting going on in my everyday life.
Last night we had great friends over with their two totally adorable little guys for dinner. I made chicken parmesan with pasta and meatballs for our meal, and then for dessert, some pound cake layered with strawberries and whipped cream. Delish! Even better was the good company of our awesome friends and the laughs with their boys. Have I mentioned how adorable they are? OK, just checking! It was a fun night and I think the first time I’ve ever restrained from having alcohol, Rosemount Shiraz to be exact. Which was kind of weird, but fine with me at the same time. I actually didn’t miss it. I saw everyone else drinking and it didn’t bother me, which is awesome. And I love me some good red wine! Of course playing safe, I didn’t want to go there; I may as well get used to it now. Practice makes perfect.
We didn’t do much yesterday during the day. In the morning we met with my father, our financial advisor, and our attorney up at my dads office to discuss setting up a Trust for Eric’s life insurance policy. It was awkward, but necessary, especially with children on the horizon. We had to discuss things about ages money would become available to surviving children and the way it would be distributed to them should something, God forbid, happen to Eric, and then eventually me. We had to talk seriously about Power Of Attorney stuff and who to appoint after each other, DNR’s and all that morbid talk. It was emotionally draining. I don’t like to think about ANY of that, but I suppose it is smart to plan ahead. And my father is a huge advocate of that, being a financial advisor and all. After that I did the normal weekend cleaning and then prepared all the food for our before mentioned dinner.
Oh Yeah! And Friday night we went to go see 27 Dresses! Kim now you don’t have to ask me if I’ve seen it yet…LOL. I’ve wanted to see it for ever now. It was good, pretty funny but I would wait until it comes out on video if you haven’t already seen it. Just my opinion.
And now today we are kinda just hanging around. It’s cloudy and rainy here on Long Island. And the temperature is supposed to drop as the day goes on. I really really really wish we would have one good snow fall! Just one. It always looks so pretty and then I love to go drive around the neighborhoods to see how beautiful the trees and the houses look covered in snow. Geeeeek! I also still have to finish cleaning and purging the upstairs spare bedroom (the one that will eventually be the nursery). I started last week and have more to purge. Just very not in the mood right now. But it’s still very early here, so I’ll get to it.
In super exciting news…this week we may find out if this cycle was a success. I have my first beta on Tuesday! Now, I’ve given this lots of thought, and I’m 99.229% sure I’m not going to post anything about the results for at least a week, whether it is or isn’t positive. Why? To protect our innocence and not jinx anything, as dumb as that may sound. So I’m sorry folks…there will be a bit of a longer wait for you guys before you know anything. But I have to do what I have to do. We need to see if things move in a positive direction before yelling from a mountain top that I’m pregnant, if in fact I am. I’m sure you all understand. I’ll still be posting regularly though…just not about whether I am or am not. It will be extremely early in the game and I just don’t think I will feel comfortable spreading the word with it being to fresh and fragile.
On the other hand, I have been known to give out Christmas gifts early. So be sure to check back often because I may not be able to contain myself if I am!
So today kind of sucks…A LOT! I’m feeling quite miserable, to say the least. It started this morning when I was laying in bed trying to convince myself to get up. My back has been bothering me the past few days but I think it has to do with the progesterone supp’s, or at least that’s what I’m attributing it to. But today, it is terrible soreness, all in my lower back. I laid there squirming around like a fish out of water, ok maybe not that bad, but you know what I mean. So needless to say I just did not want to get out of bed. I know I know, you’re all saying, “hey, you think I want to get out of bed in the morning?”. But this is like, it takes everything I have, every ounce of energy inside of me, to drag myself out. It was 8am, and I literally picked my legs up and threw them to the floor. I was finally up. But I know in a few hours I will be tired again. Tired to the point of nodding off. I have started drinking decaf tea in the morning and caffeinated in the afternoon, to help keep me away until bedtime, which has been earlier and earlier each night.It wasn’t long before my crampiness started in again. I think this may be a byproduct of the backache? If that makes any sense. Either that or it’s again, attributed to the progesterone. As I sit here in my awesome office chair that I L.O.V.E., usually, I am so ridiculously uncomfortable. I don’t know what position will leave me feeling better today. If it’s not sitting and it’s not laying, what then? I think I will run out and grab some Tylenol, since that’s the only thing they tell you to take when you’re pregnant, or possibly could be. Got to play it safe here, right?
Then there’s the constipation. I’m not the kind of person to get constipated, EVER. But I am. Ho Hum. At first I thought that it was due to the salads I’ve been eating. Every night for the past few nights I’ve been making myself a nice big salad with baked chicken on it. Delish! But I’m pretty sure salad is roughage, and the opposite would happen. I am now chalking it up to the progesterone. Poor progesterone, such a bad rap!
Anyway…sorry to complain to you guys. Instead of complaining to my husband, I figured I’d spare him the frustration and pile it up onto you guys!
Oh yeah, when talking to my acupuncturist yesterday, he seemed rather confidant with our chance for success. He said that with my age, my husband’s count and the success I’ve had with ovulating the past few cycles, we should be in good shape. Although I know I can’t feed off of everything he or anyone else say’s and get my hopes sky high thinking this is a no- brainer, b/c it very well may not work the first time.
It’s funny because you can read any message board and find these same complaints from women who are pregnant. I’m trying not to read into anything here. I’m trying to stay as sane as is humanly / womanly possible. Besides, it’s waaaaay to early to feel any symptoms. Both fortunately, and unfortunately. Thoughts are positive, but not getting my hopes up higher than they already are. Coasting along until next week
I can’t believe it’s been 3 days since I’ve updated my blog! What’s wrong with me?? I feel like a bad Mom or something. This week just seems to be escaping me. Quickly!I did go to the doctor for my 7 day post iui blood workup yesterday. Actually it’s just my Progesterone levels they tested. No sono, no meeting with the doctor. It was literally a 3 minute visit, I was floored. Usually there are a handful of women in there and I’m in and out in all of an hour or so, but not yesterday. I was actually the first / only one there. They told me they would call in the afternoon by 3pm if anything to report. This is usually protocol.
My phone rang around 2:30. The nurse told me that the doctor wants me on Progesterone supplements…intra vaginal suppositories to be exact. Mmmm. Fun. The nurse also made it very clear that this does not mean that I AM or I AM NOT pregnant. Point taken. I’ve read horror stories from women who are on these things. But, I gotta do what I gotta do. So I get instructions that the pharmacy who distributes these little fun pockets will contact me and deliver them tonight. I get the call, go through all the insurance b.s. and they got here around 9:00 last night. They aren’t as bad as I’ve read…yet. The instruction packet warns of side effects such as abdominal pain and swelling, extreme fatigue, depression, mood swings, amongst many other really scary things you wouldn’t want happening to your body/ mind. Besides the depression, I have all of those NOW! Can these things actually make it worse? Because honestly, if I get any more tired, I probably shouldn’t leave the house because I’d be a threat to society out on the road!
Despite the instructions and graphic details on how to administer the meds…I wonder how many people actually still try to swallow them…LMAO!!!
So now we wait until the tail end of next week for anything more. In the meantime I saw my acupuncturist this morning for a support session to help raise my progesterone levels as well. Besides it is uber relaxing! Ahhh, I love it.
Otherwise, nothing new going on ’round my hood. Things are status quo.
Happy Super Bowl Sunday! Although I don’t follow football…queue Booing now…I understand it is a HUGE deal for many and I hope you all have a terrific day of munching, drinking and hanging with friends!
That being said, today is day 23 of my cycle and I’m now 5 days past the iui. The longest 5 days known to mankind. I feel crampy every day, it comes and goes. It is so early in the game however, that I am sure it is just all in this crazy ass head of mine. My lower back is also bothering me, but I believe it is from sitting on the bleachers for 2 hours watching my cousins wrestling match Friday night, combined with the ridiculous cleaning I did yesterday. My boobs are also super sensitive since the day of the iui. I’m 99.9% sure this is from the hcg trigger shot I had Monday. Pregnancy hormones = pregnancy symptoms. Right? Although I am checking more often than I care to admit, to see if my nipples are any darker, LOL!
So Tuesday can’t come fast enough. I’m so on edge about this appointment because even though I know it’s too early for a beta; my biggest fear right now is being told “It doesn’t look like it worked this first time.” I will be crushed. I will be crushed because I have gotten my hopes up. I have gotten my hopes up so high, despite the fact I told myself I wouldn’t. I feel in my heart that this was it, one try and bam, in 9 months I’ll have a perfect little miracle to ooh and ahh over. I mean, it happens to many people on their fist shot, right. Besides, our only fertility issue is my lack of ovulation. And in the past 3 months on the lowest dose of Clomid, I have been ovulating. So taking the distance away from the little swimmers should be all it takes, right? Only time will tell. We will know in a few weeks. Tuesday’s appointment they’ll test my Progesterone to make sure it is optimal to sustain a pregnancy should this cycle result in one.
As I try and pass time efficiently, I have many “to do’s” on my list for today. I will be going through my husbands clothes to make him aware of the fact he only wears the first 2 layers of clothing in each 15 inch deep drawer (which leaves about 5 more layers of clothes untouched!) and purging things he hasn’t worn in years and/ or is over 10 years old. He doesn’t have the time to do it, so I will. Then I have my normal food shopping, laundry and then doing some “me” things. I don’t yet know what they will be, but I’ll find them! I also want to spend some time preparing food for the week. It doesn’t take long at all to prepare a few meals and freeze them or separate serving sizes of salad out so all you have to do is grab them and mix them up. We used to do this religiously every Sunday; We would spend about 1 ½ hours preparing everything (sans dinners- those are made fresh) and then we are totally set for the week, it’s awesome! We are getting back into the swing again.
On a super happy note, early Friday morning, our friends gave birth to their tiny little twins, at 36 weeks, Craig and Emma. We went yesterday to see them and they may just be the cutest, tiniest little angles I’ve ever seen. They were born at 4lbs 10oz and 4lbs 8oz respectively. Tiny little fingers, tiny little noses, tiny little everything. It was amazing to see them. She got pregnant on the first shot with the same doctor I’m seeing. Not that that has anything to do with anything, it’s just promising to personally know a success story with my doctor. They were conceived through IVF. There were actually 3 sets of twins there in the hospital, it was so great!
